Kokoro.

Back in the day we used to have what was called 'Warrior's Journey,' a training that was formulated around a heavy emphasis on Zazen, ritual, and light emphasis on Bokken work with very harsh and strange etiquette.
Those of us that undertook the Journey had more expected of us as it came to the Dojo and to life, things were taken deeper, the pressure was turned up on high, and every little mistake was scrutinized in the form of a 'cut,' something of a game we played in the Dojo that was meant to teach a lesson about something specific.

What did it/does it mean? I still cannot really answer that question, but that level of training is not for everyone, in fact, very few I feel would have stayed in the Dojo had that been the normal order of business.
Normal people (and I do not mean that as an insult) do not generally stay with something that they dislike, nor is it understood how someone can continue with it even when, at times, they seem to dislike it entirely, though never on the surface.

The level of training only deepened as years went on and the 'Warrior's Journey' type of trainining turned into month-long Zen Intensives held during the Summer at Sensei's house in Olympia after he had returned from Tassajara where he'd stayed for something like two years (more or less).
Jeff Iller Sensei, the guy that gave me my first lesson with the Bokken (and guided me through my first year of Karate training as my Mentor) was left in charge of the Dojo, a lot is owed to him for that time and effort (Here's to you Two Foxes.haha).

I don't know why I am taking this stroll down memory lane, but I think it is heading somewhere.
Most Dojo I have been to have lacked Heart, Kokoro is very important, and by heart I mean Character, with a good core group of people - nor could any of them ever truly be my home, as I am already a core part of something that is long gone.
You can never take two steps back, but you can take two steps forward - regardless of how many steps, you are always where you are, and there is the most powerful place from which you can work.
Charlie Todd took a rec room at Eastern Washington University and made it into a strong Dojo, with only myself and a guy from Isshin Ryu, there may have been only two students drawing from his knowledge, but he made it count, because that is what he loved doing.
I guess that is what separates those that come and go from those that are the pillars, the core, the fact that love for the training is deep, while the other is just a passing curiosity.
This can be forgiven as, again, it is never for everyone and never will be, but it is always open to those who want to take a peek.

The core and the spirit are the heart, and the heart is what makes or breaks things - generic organizationship is just a franchise.
What makes a true family? What does any of this really mean and where is it leading? Interestingly enough, I'm certain someone may reply with an answer, or not, no big deal either way. Just a standing curiosity among many standing curiosities, right?